Sunday, December 28, 2008

Moody Saddy


Nothing really happened today, every routine was just ordinary, nothing unexpectedly happened.
It just the feeling that doesnt seem to compromise.

Did shopping for a while and ended up, as usual, impulse purchase again *sigh...
I thought it would make me feel better, at least, in what so ever reason. But Nah....
All stuffs are still beautifully sit inside the paper bag and I dont even bother to unpack it. Indeed, feel like return back all.

Was it because of 'it'?, I suppose too. Since the moment I knew 'it', my mood changed, i just couldnt control it.
I must have expect it too much, everything doesnt even start yet and I have already expected the ending, duh!

Or was it because of monthly mood swing due to hormone? It makes sense too I guess.

Or may be because of my office wear that i wore today was a little bit 'bang' and I didnt feel looks good on me? Nah... normally I dont care whether it looks good or not, as long as it is comfortable and I like it, it will be fine!
ARGH!!! Just want to find out what the heck is going on me today.
So irritating!

I suddenly miss my dad a lot. I was wondering, will my life be different if he still here? ~.~

Monday, December 8, 2008

Merry Christmas!!!

I hope everyone feels as happy as I am :D, If you weren't then you HAVE TO!!!

It is Christmas! Happy, Joy, Holly time!

If you are stress because of workload, dont worry, you have to be thankful to have work to do during this global recession time.
Dont think of how much bonus that you will receive at the end of this year. If you are still working and hearing your boss say 'I want you to finish it by next month!'. That is your BONUS, at least you know that you have a secure job until next month =)

Want to celebrate Christmas but money tight?
Dont worry, get a 180cm Christmas tree at Carrefour for just $19.90 (hard to believe eh!), but dont compare the quantity k'
Try to decorate the tree by yourself, trust me, you will feel something special.
Dont know how to decorate? Easy, just GOOGLE it! hihihi.

I wish those who just lost their job, all the best and dont give up k'!
Just treat it as a long leave that you have to clear. Spend that time with your close one, families and friends. Just be positive that next year will be better.
Perhaps, if you have savings, take out small part of it and invest it in blue chip companies ;) (only small part k' NOT all!!)

I know and everyone know that the time is bad, it hit globally, but we cant do anything, we cant turn back or move forward the time, so just CHEER and walk through it.

I'm feeling happy even I am freaking miserably poor this month especially after paying my last month credit card bill *sigh... anyway, It just money and we can get it back soon. So, dont waste your time with this once a year joyful moment, ~~~MERRY CHRISTMAS~~~

*** Better to light up the candle rather than cursing the darkness that shrouding us.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008


If What they all said that next year will be better, then I hope it better be!

Monday, November 10, 2008

Office Update

No... not office update, it is a prison update.

Half hourly send email law has changed.....
Yes changed to 15 MINUTES once.... F%$^#)@ crazy rite?
Yah yah, everything happen, happen for a reason.
She got her 'reason'
This is the reason....
" I'm fully aware that I did not factor in breaks times. However, some of you have just decided, without consulting with me first, to do thing on your own way. It started with one person and words get around and half of you have made your own rules on how frequently I would be getting this report"
Then she mentioned, there are 5 people that need to send her email every 15 minutes . And separated email will be sent to those who receive the punishment.
Now 2 confirm since they are working currently, left 3 unanimously.

I'm sure I'm one of them who will received the medal. Why?
Because I was the initiator HAHAHAHA.
Since I was the 1st person who was working when this stupid thing was implemented, I told everyone that I didnt send out email during my break time. So, most of them follow me (Sorry dudes).

But, what the hell, its my break time, everyone entitle 1 hour to rest, be it you want to eat, pee, poo, sleep, jungkir balik kek, its all up to us. Who the hell think of need to send you email!
Haih... since I heard this news, I was really tired, I feel like throwing something to her face.
I even think of publish her photo to the STOMP or other publicity, with a header 'Cruel Office Bitch' .
I also have to blame her on my vulgarity words!!!!

So, the conclusion is, since we all dont care to send her email during our break, we can still dont send but now we have to send her email every 15 minutes during working hours.

Where is the justice? To whom we can complaint?
HR? We tried before, but end up we suffered more from that devil.

We can only talk to each other but there is no one from upper level will listen us.
Just hope next year ecomony recover fast enough so we can go.

Monday, October 27, 2008


Its been a week, kept having nightmare every night.
The dreams so alive, I still can remember until today.

Chasing and attacking by an alligator.
In the dream, I was a huge turtle and teased by an apes with a weird black mark in its face.
Being forced to marry someone that I dont even know (I shouldnt wake up for this one, so I can see 'his' face LOL).

What's tonight then? *sigh.....

Friday, October 17, 2008

F*^#)%^ Office

A lot of things has happened in the office. I like what I'm doing now but the environment is fucking unhealthy. *sigh... I cursed alot today

I tried to be fair to all, i dont side anyone coz I know If I side either party, at the end I will have pain in my ass. I told all of them that I wont side any of you, coz I want to survive in this environment, I have to cover my own ass first. I even told those who I care the most that just go office do your job and go home, dont care so much!

Well, being nice is not always be appreciated! I'm tired to be nice really, Should I just be a fucking bitch in the office just to force you all to respect me.

When I knew some of them plan to leave and resign, I advices others who I closer with to not get influence by them. If they want to go, just let them go. But at the end, my manager thought I was one of them whom influenced other to have a 'mass resign'. I really couldnt take it at that time, I even told my manager 'Yeah, everyone know that I'm best friend with her, and I know she want to leave this company, but DOENST mean that I will follow, I know what I'm doing, doesnt mean that my colleague go, then i will follow!' I was really pissed off at that time.

3 of my colleagues received a letter stating that their probation being extended for 3 months and it happened 2 of them are the closest colleagues of mine. So, the conclusion, my life wont be as smooth as normal. To make things even worst, there is a complaint queen (*bitch) in the office who always complaint everything to my bias manager. Sometimes I really dont know how she can become a manager with her lack of managerial leadership skills *sigh....

Today I received a call from my colleague said that the bitch doenst feel happy, the bitch say 'Sue said something behind my back, this morning Sue whispering to Risha and I'm not stupid, I know they are talking bad thing about me, I can listen to it!'

Then my colleague told me everything, actually she just want to clarify with me since we are really close and she want to know what and why I said something behind that bitch!

I was really pissed, some more I just woke up and damn tired bcoz of stupid night shift and I have few more nights to go. I was so angry coz I never said anything about her, I dont even remember when and what whispering that I did to Risha, unless I got short term memory!!! I got better thing to do rather than talk about that bitch, OK! Fucking idiot how dare she pinpoint me said something bad about her. The worst part, I'm sure she already complaint it to my brainless manager. I really feel like calling that bitch 'stop assuming and just shut your fucking mounth!'. But I dont want to drag my colleague who told me everything, inside this stupid incident.

Sorry to my colleague, I didnt mean to scream and curse on her on the phone. She said that she shouldnt tell me if she knew I would this piss. Of course I piss, how would you feel if people pinpoint you on something that you never do! Tell me about it man!!!!!

I really tried not yo get in deep relationship with anyone in the office since all the politics are created. My colleague told me 'Sue, do you know that being the good one not always be appreciated?' I know, I dont need your appreciation, just leave me alone and dont push my limit! If I never do it, its mean i never do it, dont simply pinpoint other and I'm sure none of human being with brain and feeling like to be pinpointed!!!

I decided will bring this issue to the head of HR next week. I dont even bother to talk to my manager. I really cant survive if this thing keep on coming.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Miserable Night Shift

My night now turn to a miserable shift. It is ok without pedi-mani, watching dvc, or browsing Internet, but without SLEPPING..... it is too much *sob....

New regulations from the manager, for night shifters and weekend shifters, every half-hourly has to send her email stating what we did for the past half an hour. Can you imagine, every half hourly!!!!!!!!

Last night was the first night the rule has been implemented and that was my shift, freaking shit right! and I still have 6 more night shifts until end of this months. We (me and my colleague) can only resting and try to remind each other to send out the emails. *sigh.... what a nightmare.

All of them make fun of my eyes, "Su, poor your new eyes!'. Exactly, poor my eyes!!!

Friday, October 3, 2008

Eye Surgery

Well, I did it =)

I wasn't that brave though, I was really scare. Even though I felt nothing during the surgery because of the anaesthetic effect but I knew what the doc did to my eye; I could hear the cutting sound (tsek tsek tsek) when the doc cut my upper eye skin. The sound exactly just like when you cutting a paper. I smelt some burning at the end of the operation, I guess the doc was using kind of laser thing (not really sure and forgot to ask the doc after that).

This was my eye before the surgery. I sent this pic to the doc before surgery for consultation. When the D day, the doc told me that the puffy eyes are not only contain of fats, it might because of excess skin or the eyes' texture itself.

Then without any big preparation, the nurse lead me to the operation room and start inject the anaesthetic. It was hurt though, 3 times for each eye. The surgery process I think only took 30 minutes, but if including anaesthetic and rest after surgery, it took around an hour. Fast yah!

I didnt feel pain at all after surgery just a bit giddy, I still in shock may be hahahha. Then after that, we went to grocery store near our house and went to buy Dunkin Donuts. Jae's insisted that Korea's Dunkin is better. On the way home, we still stop for some snack hahahha.

This was my eye condition right after the surgery, really not painful but abit hard to open my eye. On the first day itself, after rested for few hours, we went out for night shopping and reached home around 2 am. I know it was bad for my eye =(

So, for the first few days i have to put either ices or cool eye pad on to my eye. Most of the time they would make fun of me and took picture on it. This pic look like chicken little with goggle hahahha.

Then the rest you can see the discovering process from day to day. The second day after surgery we directly went for a tour to Jeju and Busan due to time constraint hehehehe. Hantam trus deh!!!

2nd Day in Jeju, during tour (look like monster eh!)

3rd Day in Jeju, during tour

4th Day in Busan, after The Hot Spring Spa

5th Day in the train, way back to Seoul and also the day I have to go back to the doc to take out the stitches.

6th Day, no more stitches

7th Day, on the flight to Hongkong

8th Day, I believe this was like 90% recovery =) Yeay...

I do really recommend this doctor (no commission though hehehe). If someone interested, you can email the doctor directly and this is the website ( My doc is Dr Park, with curly broccoli hair hahaha.

And this website,, was the one I found out in the internet about the surgery process.

So, after everything, I still cant believe that I did it hahaha. I think this was the craziest thing that I ever decided to do after a tattoo 3 years back =)

Sunday, August 31, 2008

No Daily Routine

I dont know I should say it the best or worst day in the week.

Woke up in the morning, packed my gym stuff and ready to go. Planned to attend beach body class at 1:20 then follow by body balance and then step class.
Since I reached Bugis early, not even 11, so I visited Starbucks for breakfast, latte and bagel (gosh, I dont know how long already I never tasted bagel, It was so good!)

Well, I was reading my 'Marshmallows for Breakfast' and the time was around 12 pm. I dont know whether I was addicted to the story or the weather made me really hesitate to leave my chair. I started thinking 'ok, if I skip today beach body class, I can still join the same class tomorrow morning and make up for it, since you now, according to research it isnt good to do same exercises in 2 days' (pardon me if I made wrong research lol).

So, I text Mikie asked what is she doing after her church. Time passed 12:30, still no reply. Well, I told myself, I will skip beach body class and will join Step class at 3:40 and Zumba perhaps, coz' I cant just stop reading (another excuse). Then time passed so fast plus it was raining. Now the time passed 2 pm. Damn fast!!

To be honest, I was really no mood for exercises. I really sit from 11:30 to 4 pm and I can feel my butt was hurting. Finally I decided to leave at 4 plus. I was telling myself that I got to eat something before I go home, but I think the caffeine still in my stomach, I didnt feel hungry at all. I just ate 1 bagel and 1 medium vanilla latte though.

I walked to the food court, no appetite at all, then I decided to buy fruit (I'm having bad mouth ulcers again *sigh) and went down to basement to have Soup Spoon. I tried minestrone, it wasnt bad, but I still prefer clam chowder and tomato basil =)
Then i visited cold storage as usual and get my peanut butter and quaker oatmeal.

I reached home and suddenly I remembered that I still havent finished watching Ugly Betty. So, the conclusion is after reading whole afternoon, I spent my whole evening until now (just finished) watching Ugly Betty in YouTube. I finished season 2, cant wait for season 3 hihihihi.

Yeah, this is how I spent my off day, duhh... I think i love my work days more from now on =D

Friday, August 1, 2008


It was just promises, convinsing conversations and sweet talks, which you and me knew at the end it will turn to dust, turn to nothing *sigh
Only took couples of months, it started with nobody, then became friend and the relationship growth stronger became like a family.
I was blessed to have a chance to know you, but somehow I wasnt sure you are sincere with me as a friend and almost like a wanna be family (you are the one who always plant this seed into my brain), sadly speaking, i guess you forgot about it and you werent sincere.

Well, its just disappointment for me in making friend. I thought i was smart enough to choose human being to be my friends but i was wrong again. What a life eh!
I was proud of you when we met, yes indeed, I followed almost 100% on whatever you told or guided me. However, it turned abit annoying after awhile, you werent guide me anymore but more on forcing me. But, still, i never thought we have to end our friendship just like that. I dont expect to talk face to face to you but at least virtually, cant we?

I have already let go all of the hopes. There is no loss to lose a friend like you, I guess. I knew that we come from different worlds, i knew you are disappointed with my last decision but I hope you can respect it, anyway, it is my life, I'm the one who suppose to decide and not anyone else. Last message for you 'I'm doing alright now, I love my life and I never regreted on my last decision =)'

Just these few days I was keep thinking why why and why we cant be friend? You were the one who always said always keep in touch, but what happen then???

Past few days a friend told me 'Not everyone can be friend with, even your best friend can become your enemy one day' *sigh


Tuesday, July 8, 2008


Its been awhile everything just sail smoothly.
Now the problems come, feel a bit cracking
Why everything must appear at the same time?
Too smooth? complaint... Too challenging? complaint too
So, What the diff? Life is full of complaining

Try to be as kind as possible
Dont bother others' problem, hope to be left alone peacefully too
But things do not turn up well
Others just unhappy to see others happy
Vice versa, others will try to do something to see others fall
Physically tired is make sense, but emotionally? Duh...

Hope she will have better life after everything she gone through
Can do much to help but consoled
Felt the same as her feeling though
Thought everything is running well, in fact, Not
Tired... damn tired

Friday, June 27, 2008

The Face - RyanDan

Traveler of the great dividesVagrant on a path to life
Everyday feels a little closer
To where it is that you're headed for
Given to a hope of so much more

For every time you fall apart
There'll be a soul to guide your journey
But if you choose to turn away
There in the mirror
You'll see my face
You'll see my face

Think you're on this road alone
Looking for a truth untold

Many times you've been close to breaking
Giving up and letting go
Something inside says it's not over

For every time you fall apart
There'll be a soul to guide your journey
But if you choose to turn away
There in the mirror
You'll see my face

And when the world crowds your space
Remember days when noise was silent
Now empty vows, loveless displays
Just a sense of knowing
You'd see my face
You'd see my face

* I love this song, i provide lyrics then u all go youtube ok hehehehehe
Hope you all like it too =)

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Smooth Life

Few update from past few weeks

I sprained my ankle again during step class, this time is really bad, i can still feel the pain even though i have been resting for almost 2 weeks.

Last week, when I was walking toward office at around 6.30 am, I passed by Suntec. I saw a security guard sitting on the indoor water fountain near Roots and Fat face. Then suddenly he turned and look at me, then he stood up and walked down from the water fountain and waited for me to walk pass him. Damn, I was so scared because he was keep smiling at me (I think he is a bit retarded), luckily I still can show him my angry face and i try to walk away calmly. Beside, there was few aunties walked behind me. *huih....
Why everytime I will meet these kind of people? What did I do eh? I think I bullied too many 'siau lang' in my previous life!

Last week went massages twice =). Last Saturday with July, then Thursday with Jae (she paid for it tho') hehehehe.

My landlady super duper nice and like to give me food, now i know why I cant lose weight! hahahhahah (by the way, she just gave me dessert) But it doesnt mean that nice = food. LOL

Work, the shift is started and I'm still adapting with the sleeping hour. So far I have not slept well. I heard from somebody before, that if you have a great boss, you colleagues mostly are b@#$*. Other way, if you have nice colleagues then you boss is a killer. Now I get it! Wanna guess which one?
This month, my off days are Monday and Tuesday, *sian...

Last but not least, Ladiessssss, we are going to Bali soon!!!! =)

Thursday, June 5, 2008


So lame and embarrassing incident!!!

I think today is not my day, supposed to leave office at 4 pm, but then I stayed (we actually) until 5 30 pm. Normally we take shuttle bus to mrt station, today 'ke khiang' take bus 133 to Bugis. We (me n Belle) have waited almost 30 minutes for the stupid bus to reach.

The bus finally came at 6 pm. I never took bus to Bugis before, so I just follow Belle. Since she was going to library, before she alight, she reminded me to alight at next stop.
But "Freak..." the bus did not stop at bugis junction, infact it stopped at the bugis mrt, just after KFC.
I still think that's OK, well.. no problem, still near to CF, just opossite. Happily walk, tik tok tik tok 'Ouch, auw.. ahhhh' WHERE IS MY HEEL?!!!!

Do you still remember Mentos Ad? yah, yah, that is what exactly happened to my heel. So embarrassing, swear, and it was around 6 pm plus, can you imagine the crowd? Gosh!!!
Then I sat down and tried to break the right side of my shoes (i was trying to do it professionally and act cool). But I couldnt Break it!

I couldnt think of anything, I called Belle. I really didnt know who I should call. Thanks Belle, she promise me she will come over. While I was waiting for her, almost everyone who passed me would look at me leg. I was thinking what wrong with them, why keep staring at my leg? I felt like a crown (negative way) or superstar (hahahahha).

Then, I saw 1 indian man (a bit siau siau) was walking towards me. I was like 'geezzz, dont do that to me, I cant run'. I really dont know what I did or what i ate early today, that siau Indian guy suddenly stop in front of me. He really freak me out man.....

Like there is a choice, duhhh, I stood up and tried to walk away as normal as i can, then moved to other seat. Dont ask me about surrounding, I didnt dare to look at it! Really sooooo phai se!
20 minutes waiting for Belle was like forever. Finally she came, of course with her laughter she insisted that we have to walk to the taxi stand in Bugis if really want to take taxi home. No choice, then we walked =( fyi, she still took picture with her phone while we were waiting for the traffic light. First, nobody noticed my heel, but since she has to squat down to take the pic, all my surrounding looked my leg. Bingoooo, you win Belle!

Here, Belle's masterpiece. Geezzzzz, i love this shoe and I just wore it not more than 5 times. I hope it can be repaired, *sob

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Need Variety...

This what my colleague always said, "I need variety!"
I think I need it too, in fact, everybody should own it.
Life is so monotonous; wake up, go to work, gym n go home. Dont you think it make you dull?
Can predict what is gonna happen for tomorrow or may be for the whole week, no excitement at all.
I really dont know how to make myself happy.
I used to release it through shopping. But now, FREAK!
I have a strange notion when I shop, especially clothes. I love it, I try it on, the price is right and I will buy if I like it. But now, I dont know what phobia hit me, I never bought the clothes.
My heart keep telling me "dont buy it or you will regret. Can you imagine wearing the same cloth with others and you guys bump each other on the street? Gosh!!! dont buy it and put it back!"
It always work and now I feel something wrong with me ARGH!!!!!!!

One more thing, I really should find a unit asap. I cant stay with owner, it doesnt mean my owner rude, they are great! But i need a house not a room *sob*
I need to do alot of things, gotta lose more weight, have my eyebrow done, buy a fan for my sauna room, plan for a trip and start saving~~~~~~

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Not Again...

I saw pictures of my ex-colleagues to Japan. "Only if " I was still there, may be I will be in the picture too ARGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

I shouldnt have this feeling, they are not for me.
I looked forward for this tour since last year, I supposed to be there, hikzzzzzz.
Sometimes it just unfair or may be I give up too early.
But I no regret to leave the company.
The only thing is, I deserve to go for the tour too, I hit the yearly target, I really HIT it!!!


Tuesday, April 1, 2008

New Life

So far everything seems good for me. I have been working for almost 2 weeks, yup still honey moon period, even my job scopes still not really clear, but I'm happy to be part of the team.
I think I have nice colleagues (or may be too soon to judge) but we are really can get along pretty well.

Well, I just moved to my new room for 4 nights. Frankly speaking, I'm not really get use to it yet. I always find excuses not to go home early then end up I spent quite alot outside.
Poor my colleagues and really appreciate them be my company for the past few nights. We went for window shopping (this time really window shop, we walked for 3 hours and didnt buy anything), went for dinners and we even went for happy hours drink at Balacrava. It was really unacceptable spending, but my colleague say "we are girl and single! so dont worry, this is a necessary spending!" What an excuse, but somehow its true eh LOL.

Yah, that is me update! nothing much happen, I just need to go back to gym ASAP.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Confirmation and Indian

I got it dudes!!!!! Even though the language test very funny and awkward, I did it =). Monday start training. I'm so happy, 'tuing tuing tuing'~~~~~~

Well, here the story before the test. Because I reached there earlier this afternoon, then I walked around and did some window shopping at Millenium Walk. When I was inside Guardian, looking at some body cream (honestly I didnt even know what the heck I was looking at, coz I was too nervous for the test!). Suddenly, an Indian man around 50 walked toward me and show me some kind of certificate;

Indian: Hi, how are you, this is my name card
Me: (look at him suspiciously and abit blurr)
Indian: I come from India? are you Sporean?
Me: (stupidly answer) No, I'm Indonesian
Indian: You look happy in your face, but inside you are sad, so sad. You just have broken heart, you just break up with you boy friend. (broken heart dari mana, yg ada mah desperate buat kerja)
Me: Huh?!
Indian: Now, there are 2 men who like you, one love your appearance and the other one love your heart. Give me your name and date of birth, I will tell you more
Me: No, thanks!

Then I walked away, no no, I run away from that store. Gosh..... whats wrong with that guy. Then I continued to explore the candy store, I still got 30 minutes to kill before interview times =D

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Do You Believe It?

Went for 2nd interview this morning and turn out my interviewer is 'bule'. How the interview goes, will tell you later. The most interesting fact she was telling me is 'Sporeans discriminate westerners'. Erghhhh... I disagreed with her and said Sporean treat westerners so damn well or I can say they treat westerners like a king (give me five if u agree with me).

It was started when she asked about my life in Canada. Then I said, I like everything, the people, the friendliness, the weather and the customer service over there is two thumbs up. 'How about here?' she ask. I say 'Its totally different'. Surprisingly she agreed with me, she said customer service over here very bad (can u imagine, she is 'ang mo' and she feel that way, how about us?). Then she started telling me about how her friends decided to go back to Aussie because couldnt bare with everything in Spore and Sporean itself. I told her, they are not the one who suppose to face this discrimination; in fact, us, Indonesian, Filipino, Thai and Mainland people who are facing it.

The conclusion of our 'what so call out of interview' topic has ended up she surprised me and I surprised her with all the facts from our point of view. But I still told her that I love Spore (as a country) and still can bare with the people =D

How was the interview goes? *Sigh.....
Everything was perfect until we discussed about my work experiences. She kind of disappointed on my job hopping. I really being honest with her about everything like telling her about breaking the contract and paying the penalty (of course she shocked) and about my regret towards the decisions that I made. Should I tell her a bit white lie for my own sake? But at the end I did convince her that this is the job that I want though.
She said If i got shortlisted again, I should be able to start work on next monday and this few days will get a call for a language test (its a bahasa Indonesia language test :P).

Monday, February 4, 2008


Heard something funny at Bugis Village today

2 guys were walking behind me talking about what they should have for lunch

A: their chicken rice is good e
B: really? i heard the duck not bad too
A: huh? they got duck me?
B: got, my friend tried before
A: oh... should be latest version ar, last time they only got chicken rice

Alamak, 'latest version' emang bebek ada berapa version???????

Sunday, February 3, 2008

2 more days...

They might look forward for it but absolutely not here
'You should come back earlier, you have nothing to do there too right?'
Yes, doing nothing here except gym gym and gym
Really dont think ready to go back
Kinda mess up with career now
Should regret on what have decided?

Have no plan for the future at all
Damn picky on the job, is that wrong?
Only realize things arent that simple when they started step in and try to solve it!
Convinced them will solve it by own, end up everything became awkward
Stubborn, egoist, selfish, pride... you name it, dont really care anymore!
Sometime it feels sad but mostly numb

This year... unprepared new year
No excitement like previous years
Scare to go back home town
How to convince everybody that everything is fine
Might end up going back for good though
Should I?

Monday, January 14, 2008

Back Home...

I'm home dudes. Nothing special for the trip. In fact, only for the first day we (me, mikie, hadi and his gf) have visited 3 places; gading, mangga2 and TA. Mikie companied me for the first night since nora and agnes only reach by tomorrow. We spent most of our time in our room 1025. Chatted a lot, tried to keep updated all news that we have been missed for the past 3 years and enjoyed our 'single' talks lol.

2nd day, we spent whole day with the bride having our nail done. It was fun, just feel like tai tai wanna be, sitting in the nail salon and gossiping around. (WHOLE DAY!!), the picture shows why we
enjoyed it so much =) (Nora and xin xin (the bride) monopolize the cozy chairs)
The D day come, we hit the nearest salon near the hotel. Very excited at first, but the result..... OH MY GOSH! It was a disaster, none of us like it. I look like kindergarten kid with short curly hair and the fr
inge just like I'm ready for shower. Agnes even untied her entire hair at the end. After got out from salon, we run to guardian to buy a hairspray.
Once reached the room, each of us booked
the mirror and tried to do something with the hair (lucky the room got 3 big mirrors). dont forget, we are girl and we always nag. That exactly what we did, we complaint and complaint until we satisfied with the look. (not satisfy though, but at least better).
ready for the parteeeyyy!!!

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Finally I Travel

Have been waiting for one month to find a way out from Spore, finally I have a chance to travel. I'm going to Jakarta tomorrow to attend Xin's wedding. Will meet Nora too =) after dont know how many donkey years never met. Very very excited. Although its only 4 days trip, hope I can be a better person and 'really' ready to start my new life when i came back here. (finger crossed)

Well, Hadi will become my tour guide for a day in Jakarta and we are going to meet up with Mikie too, thanks a bunch pak hadi....

Started sending my resume, in fact went to 1 interview. Frankly speaking, until now I still dont feel it right. Everything just not right for me. This way wrong, that way too complicated, another way might be too risky Aihhh...

Been emotional spending too; paid 1 year up front for gym, signed up for personal trainer that not really giving huge different result compare to working out in class basis. Tried not to shop too much, but still spent some on it (this time I have better self control on impulse buying though).

After found a good job for myself, next is moving time... gotta find new place to stay. Life is challenging eh!

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Move on to 2008

I hope for better year, i guess everybody wish for it too.
I really fell like starting my life all over from zero, which i don't know whether I should be happy or sad.
Today, start browsing jobstreet (sound familiar eh! especially for jobless men), I confused. Yes, indeed!!! Last year when i browsed on the same web, confidently i knew which field, position and even company that i wanted to go to. Now? Duh!!!

Happy when saw 'banking/financial' words on the page; but when i clicked and 'insurance industry' pop up on my screen, i closed it ASAP and all bad memories flied around my head AGAIN.
It just too hard to forget all the uncomfortable experiences. If i saw a family in the public, either they are malay, chinese or indian; out of sudden i could picture them as my client, who were listening to my presentation, giving me full of rejection and showing me their unfriendly faces. Honestly I was scare, really scare. I wish i could just run away to somewhere nobody knows me. (I know I'm weird and think too much!)
At night, especially passed by huge HBD flats, all those memories would just freshly wake up from my mind. I hate myself, why i couldnt control my feeling, why i couldnt see the bright or happy side instead of uncomfortable one. Why, why why?!
Sometimes i wish to lose my memories only for the past 5 months. I know it sounds selfish and i should be blessed on those priceless experiences that i gained instead. sigh...

It is not a good and healthy wish for 2008 though. It just like running away from reality *sigh...
Yes, I should move on and start from zero again, i guess. I wish myself good luck in my career and never ever made impulse decisions again!

Anyway, just want to share, I still love Jim Brickman, it reminds me to Windsor, small quiet peaceful place to live. Every time i listen the songs, I can imagine myself walking from the campus to 'rosedale' house =) with windy fall or even snowing winter. Sound silly eh! but i love that feeling.