Saturday, September 22, 2007

Tuing Tuing....

Weekend is here. No plans, no activities, no worries erghhh at least for the next 2 days LOL.
Feel likes going somewhere peaceful, simple, beautiful, quiet ( i must be dreaming now hahahha).

What I'm doing now is not really fun yet not torturing as well. So far, I have knocked around 2200 doors and got 194 people donate. I do not know it is a good figure to show or suckz. From the above number that shown, you all should be able to measure how thick is my face now. I welcome all rejections without trying to handle it then give a smile and walk away. Sometimes I worry one day my face will cramp because smile too much...

I don't know what should I up date now, coz I don't want to complain so much on what I'm going through right now. The bottom line is just NO turning point for me at this moment. So, everyday just looks forward for the weekends hehehhe.

One thing that I really wish I can get it now is a CAR. Funny thing is, I don't know how to drive LOL. Every time when I was traveling from east to west and standing in between of the crowd inside public transportation, I wander how nice if I have a car uihhhh.....

I think i write too much crap today. Honestly I'm freaking tired and just because tomorrow is weekend then I don't want to sleep. Weirdo eh!

Sunday, September 2, 2007

The Hardest Things

Confident enough by saying "I know what I'm doing" , but hell, it is not, i don't know what and why I was doing it. Damn.
"Others can do it, of course you can do it too right?" simple sentence has brilliant meaning but has none feeling for me
Fighting with my own ego, keep telling myself that I'm doing the right things, yes I'm doing the right things (yeah.. I' m not killing robbing or molesting people Dahhhh stupid).
But it just didn't work sometimes. The problem is I'M SCARE!!!!!
What the hell I'm scare of huh? I DON'T KNOW...

This is the most pathetic moment when you stand in the middle of no where and confusedly convincing yourself that you are in the right path and you should just continue to walk even your HEART has a big hesitate to do it.

Oh geez... I think this blog will fill with all of my junks.
- I don't like knocking on people door at night
- I don't like to beg people for donation
- I don't like people slam the door in front of me
- I don't like working at night, I'm damn freaking scare of dark!!!
- I don't like those stupid citizen stare and scold me like I'm a bugger (What the #$#%$, I can even buy your HDB if i want. That's my ego tell me when I stress out)

I know, I know this is a process. Just sometimes I cant take it, I really cant bare with it. I hate forcing myself do things that I don't like. Now, I'm really pushing myself to do it. Don't know where is the limit but hopefully my limit is unlimited.