Sunday, May 9, 2010

28 now...

What does that mean?

It means getting older, should behave more mature, think wisely, stop whining, eat healthily and exercise more =)

I had complain about my life so badly, but when I read and watched the news, I feel sorry and shame on myself.
How could I, how could I so selfish!
People out there lost their family, house, life and me... me... still complain my life is tough!

Sometimes I wonder, is any one out there also lost and look for direction?
Have they found it? How they found it?

Some people say " dont be stress out, just wait, continue do whatever you are doing now "
But this is my life, how can I continue doing it when I didnt see future on it and I'm not happy doing it? I cant wait and keep waiting, I almost rotten here.
3 more weeks, yes, after that maybe I will feel 'thats it!' but am I really happy? So far, no sense of happiness.

Anyway... thanks for all beautiful people who came over this weekend to celebrate my bday. I really appreciate it. Muach muach muach for all of you =)

Thursday, April 15, 2010

15 April 2010

Me in the office pantry this morning.
Saw 1 boss passed by, with good intention I greeted him,
"Good Morning"

He replied " Hi, morning.. +-#*@';"@*.....
Me.... Confused... What is he talking? I can't hear, I'm half deaf, I'm having flu...
Anyway, I still have to answer him...
Me: "Yeah" (cool rite, yeah will just answer everything.
He: just walk passed me....

I continue washing my bottle water and keep thinking... What did he asked me????
I think I get part of it...
Yah... Keep thinking...
Think hard...
Got it!!!!

But... Shit...

He asked me " Hi Morning, HOW ARE YOU"

Then I said "yeah....."

I'm dump!!!!!

Sunday, April 4, 2010

I may go back for good...
Is it the best way? I dont know!

In this age, yet no direction for the future, quite pathetic.
I know I have to let go either one.
Singapore where I get all the freedom (which I like) but cant find any clue for my career,
Medan where I MAY get some opportunities but.....

My heart 90% tell me I have to go back or my future will be rotten here.
Urgh..... look simple, just pack and fly back....

My brain gonna explore soon.....


How am I going to tell my mom.... *sigh...

Monday, February 22, 2010

Another Tragedy

I forgot when was the last time i felt so sick *sigh...

Starting Thursday last week, whole body was aching, head spinning, eyes burning. Took an MC then.
Called boss "morning Intan, I need to take MC, I'm not feeling well"
Silent for few seconds.....
Boss "I thought you are suppose to work morning shift for today?"
Me "Yes, I'm in the office now and i just went to the doctor"
Boss "Ok, take care, bye"
Me "Bye".... (My Boss DAMN cool isnt it!)

Friday went back to work with giddiness because of the medication consumption.

Saturday feeling better, went out movie with Eve, have a Sprite without ice (I thought it might be OK! NO... hell). Saturday night, i was starting losing my voice. Sunday morning, worst, the voice really gone. But still have to go Jen's chinese new year open house.
Nice house, plenty of food. But I didnt eat those 'heaty' stuffs, I drunk plain water for whole day, i drunk 'cheng teng' her mom's made.
Sunday night, worst. My throat was very itchy, I was coughing, coughing and coughing. I felt like my lung was coming out from my mouth.

Monday morning, time to prepare to work for afternoon shift. Felt like dying, couldnt sleep whole night, heavy head, i just realize that I couldnt taste and smell thing.
I went to doctor at 12 PM, accompanied by Elaine and Eve, the Doctor gave me 2 days MC, he insisted I go back home and rest.
Happy and scare at the same time. How to talk to my boss?

Went back to office very early at 1 PM. After settled everything in my seat, I walked to her.
Me "Intan, I need to take MC" (my voice was shaking, I knew i will cry, argh......)
Boss " You need to scan it" she looked at my face and "What happen to you?"
Me - My tear was pouring down my cheek
Boss "What happen Sue?"
Me - Directly walked to the empty sea beside her, as I pai se, alot of people walking pass by.
Me - Still cant say anything, just kept shaking my head, the tear just cant stop.
Boss (freak out) "Sue, what happen, are you ok? Is it personal problem?"
Me "sob sob sob, no... no... I just I just...."
Boss (impatiently) "What?"
Me "I just tend to cry when I'm sick"
Boss "Oh my god, what the hell are you crying"
Me - Si be pai se
Boss "Ok, tell me what happen? you was sick last thursday and you were ok on friday right?"

Then I told her bla bla bla, of course skipping the saturday movie and sunday Jen's house.

Boss "ok ok, now you just go back home and rest, what the hell are you crying for, hehehehe" (awkwardly laugh).

Me, walked back to my seat and clean my nose, which almost run down from my nose.
When I cleaned my mucus, there were blood, now this is really WHAT THE HELL!
Eve "gila su, panas banget lu berarti"
Me "nga apa2 eve nih, serem gitu ada darahnya"
Eve "nga apa apa, aku juga perna begitu, panas dalam itu"

Gosh... why i cried... really look STUPID!
I think I was so sick and so scare at that time. Am I exaggerating here? *sigh.... bego bego, memalukan.

On the way home, i think my boss still freak out, she texted me "Sue, I noticed you got 2 days MC, so I will see you on Wed, take care"
Me, need to clear the crying thingy now, and reply "Thanks, I'm so sorry, I tend to cry when I'm sick, I just feel homesick. So sorry"
She replied "Poor girl, just get your SG friends to cheer you up then"
Me - never replied the sms, and hmnnnn my boss got abit heart too.

But still, very pai se... I hope no one saw me crying, I mean those from non our department.